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Dartz Prombron - no longer includes whale penis foreskin

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Dartz Prombron - no longer includes whale penis foreskin Empty Dartz Prombron - no longer includes whale penis foreskin

Post by Olds Tue Nov 10, 2009 9:00 pm

PRESS RELEASE:

ARMORED CAR WITHOUT PENIS. LET'S SAVE THE WHALES.
One month ago DARTZ presented uberluxury armored car with whale penis interior - PROMBRON' (ex.RussoBaltique), lot of people name this car as DARTZ.KOMBAT. As the world's resonance was very huge and DARTZ got lot of angry e-mails from Greenpeace, WWF and also Pamela Anderson, DARTZ make strong decision to stop their plans regarding such interior.

"We have no any ideas to kill the whale or something like that. All we want - to make just luxury car. Real luxury car which will be world number one car. Our brand was started at 1869 when in Riga was opened Coach Factory or Russo Baltiysky Vagonnij Zavod - PBVZ, and first products was luxury train coaches. At 1907 was made a decision to open Car Department, and at 1909 first car left factory - the name of this car was RussoBalt. This was luxury and sport cars. At 1911 specially for Monaco Rally car got french style name - RussoBaltique. At 1912 factory made world first 4 x 4 wheel drive car, and at 1914 - armored car. All we want to unite luxury and armoring traditions of RussoBalt factory in one car, which brand celebrated 100 years now. At 1922 RussoBalt was renamed to PROMBRON' (ex.RussoBalt).

We just looking for most expensive products for this car - and that's why we choosed whale penis leathure when we checked it is most of most. After wave of protest we realised our mistake and make a decision not to use natural leathure at all. We will focus on world most advanced nanotechnologies to achieve interior highest quality using artificial materials which also was never used for cars. We want to tell our hello to all whales: "Our Sea Brothers! We all know that earth are stand on three whales - we will keep You live! We don't Earth fall down to Ocean!"

Also we make a decision to pay more attention to glass and on our new car model we will use glass which will be made by special technology - from artificial grown chrystals, which will be gold sputerred to cut IR and UV rays, which make driving inconvinient when sun shine.

Best regards,
Leonard F. Yankelovich
DARTZ.EU

Best parts in bold. Too funny.

http://www.autoblog.com/2009/11/10/foreskin-removal-dartz-prombron-drops-the-whale-penis/


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Post by Honor Tue Nov 10, 2009 9:07 pm

they need to fire their fucking translator. if they have one.
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Post by JaysonAych Tue Nov 10, 2009 9:08 pm

Even disregarding the cruelty issue...who the fuck is going to be impressing their friends by taking them for a ride and letting them know they're sitting on whale dick?

No matter who buys it, the seats will only be the 2nd biggest dick in the car.
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Post by ascona Tue Nov 10, 2009 9:09 pm

my brother has some mammoth ivory aronud the house...
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Post by The_Edge Wed Nov 11, 2009 7:52 pm

ascona wrote:my brother has some mammoth ivory aronud the house...

... Your point is?
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Post by millertime Wed Nov 11, 2009 8:10 pm

wow. I just read Rod's title

"1955...that's when I invented the Rue Capacitor, which makes Woe and Rue possible."

That's Awesome
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Post by ascona Wed Nov 11, 2009 8:55 pm

The_Edge wrote:
ascona wrote:my brother has some mammoth ivory aronud the house...

... Your point is?

it's in the same price range.
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